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Main | News | Cut-away | fotobio | Prose | About Dostoevsky | J. Roberts | Humour | Non-fikshn | Criticism | Nude Teens |
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LJUPOF P. 13 |
2. Koitus To Alina, on August, 4th, 20-18 (very important question) Alina, excuse for a question and calm me up to the end and more time (you know what I hypochondriac and as I am afraid of AIDS!): you with it precisely had yesterday an elastic band??! Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 4th, 20-50 (I Specify!) Was, Lyosha, was! I only with you am not protected … to You I trust in all! Chavo-nt ischo pisnyosh? Smoke. To Alina, on August, 4th, 21-14 (Has calmed) Thanks, Alinas, has calmed. By the way, I admit: not so for itself it is terrible, as — for you. You will pick up from it any muck or, than that is worse, you will become pregnant. Though you, of course, quite adult girl and understand all … If it is possible to be explained in love — I speak: today it was once again convinced, that I LIKE YOU! But … But I RELEASE you: go flirt, tempt, fall in love, fuck, marry … SUCCESSES! Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 4th, 21-45 (Gratitude) Lyosha! The sun! Thanks for kind words in my address — the warmest, gentle and light, especially about "fuck"! Very lovely and sincerely! Write — at you remarkably it turns out. Did not expect … Long, probably, thought. I like you, your toad. P. S. And nevertheless I of IT do not deserve ALL … P. R S. You always (every second) do not suffice me! I LIKE YOU!!! You do not release me!!! I all in your web!!! Smoke. To Alina, on August, 4th, 23-10 (It is horror and a nightmare!) Alina, that you with me do! For words «I like you!!!» … even there are no words, do not know what to tell. I at all do not understand you. Now considered your photos (peered at your photos!) … too I do not know what to tell. More correctly, approximately so: you both an angel, and a witch … You happen the GIRL, and happen also the MAID … As I like the first and I do not like the second! I think only of you — without interruption on a dream and other nonsense. Listen, at me here the theory has appeared: instead of WHETHER HAVE forced you me to torment??? WHETHER HAVE ordered to you to leave me??? If it was so, to me it would be easier … In vain I, of course, all it write … I after all all already HAVE apprehended And HAVE accepted. What do you live already absolutely the life what I HAVE already let in MYSELF another … already I enjoy the pain (you have not forgotten, what I "person Dostoevsky"?). But from this "pleasure" it is possible and to go mad! Good. Will suffice. AND. D. P. S. Has just now noticed, that my initials smotrjatsja-are read gloomy, significantly and ominously: really — a hell! At least, in a shower … To Alina, on August, 5th, 15-23 (Last request) Alina expensive and native mine of the Smoke! I you asked not to meet it at our bench on Quay. You should understand, what is it for me means (well not absolutely you thick-skinned much!). And here today you saw with it even at faculty. To me, naturally, at once have hastened to report. (Whether this gopher to us has taken in head to arrive?) Alina, same ours With YOU the HOUSE!!! Alina, arrange the personal destiny, but do not spit in soul — I ask! Or take then keys from me from THAT apartment, arrange with it svidanki and there … AND. AND. Alyoshe, on August, 5th, 18-24 (It is important!) Alexey! Aleksejushka! Lyosha! Lyoshka! We always will be for each other the most close people! So the God has solved, and we cannot make-correct anything! And I do not want I (can not)! Give we will not be children, human heat is a gift of heavens! With you for two it has got to us! Do not kill that, for what I thank Supreme every morning and night! We never will stop loving each other! I wish to see you at university — your eyes, a smile, to talk to you … I remember all — everyone yours mozaichku … I Ask, give we will wait, we will calm down also to anybody on light we will not resolve (we will not allow!) to lose each other, to delete from memory! It is important both for you, and for me … Between us always there will be a thread, I feel it … Believe, only not to you (NOT to YOU!) I wish to hurt! And if nevertheless I do (so it is left-turns out) is in any way purposely, not from harm … When you have told now by phone that you wish me to hate — heart in a breast has cracked, as a nut which just about razgryzut … Lyoshenka, it is not necessary, please, I ask … We should (are obliged) to save that between us is! And IT is And ALWAYS WILL be!!! I simply wish to be your friend … do not forget, you hear, never forget: even if the Third will begin world and not far off there will be a doomsday — all of us equally remain angels, we have grown together with wings, you remember after all! Neither you, nor I these wings we will not cut, we will not break, we will not turn out … One destiny — one wings (two wings for two)! Not we so have solved, and It … Yours of the Smoke. To Alina, on August, 5th, 17-03 (Too it is important) Alina, native mine! It is very interesting formulation: I do not wish to do to you painfully, simply so it turns out … The darling, I ask not about much: it is not necessary to result the new lover in one of our houses, it is not necessary to begin your meetings-appointments with it near to faculty where we saw you (we we will see and more), rejoiced each other almost every day where had sex … I repeat: it is ours with you the house! And to arrange near to it and in him appointments to another, it is bad, it is dishonourable, it, eventually, meanly! Your WERE. P. S. A smoke! The clear head you washing, Alina! I simply beg: cease about «accrete wings»! It is already even not blasphemous, it — is improbable. You only present-imagine: when you with the gopher have sex (on ours with you of terminology, excuse, — you fuck), I — accrete with you wings — where during this moment I am, what I do? Together with you in one rate and a rhythm I am shaken???!!! P. P. S. Alinka, lovely my and native girl! Make the choice, do, that you want, only admit to yourself and remember: it from your party — CHANGE, this TREACHERY … You wish to live and be with it quiet — live and be quiet. Uncle Lyosha. Alyoshe, on August, 5th, 20-40 (be not loaded!) Lyoshka! You — the best! And I — white, fluffy and kind. It is necessary to be able only from this kindness a key to find … Fluffy Alinka. To Alina, on August, 5th, 21-02 (About ljupfi) Alinka, the girl you my kind with a key! Here what curve and sklizkaja thinking has crept in my violent as regards imagination golovushku. Would be, I think, well, stryomno and it is fair, if on THURSDAYS (well and — to SUNDAYS) at the moment of the beginning of affinity with the bojfrendom (and all others which will be) you suddenly recollected, that today THURSDAY (well or — SUNDAY), and mentally screamed: «My God! After all today I should do by tradition IT with Lyoshechkoj!!!» And at you from this thought-vspominanija terrible spasms of walls Matryony and intolerable spasms of feet would begin, and from within an organism the disgust and nausea wave to sejchasnomu to the partner, to its sweaty smell, puffing and fussy movements … would rise Take it into consideration: on THURSDAYS and SUNDAYS it is obligatory during the moments of sex with another recollect me — RECOLLECT, RECOLLECT, RECOLLECT! It is gipnotichesko-virtual suggestion. And I hope, that now every THURSDAY and every SUNDAY in ENTI minutes you will NECESSARILY recollect me … Well and other five days of week — same more than it is enough for a normal happy SATISFACTORY life. Alina, lovely, remember: THURSDAY and SUNDAY!!! (A little bit it is a pity to me, that we met you and had sexual contact yesterday, on Wednesday — today, on Thursday, it would be more symbolical …) However, and yesterday all was perfect! Thanks, my pleasure! And more, of course, thanks that today, having seen me in a window, left (before appointment to it!!!) from the house on street with me, as during age-old times, some metres also proshlas-has walked. You in general — the kind girl. I without any irony speak it. Yes you also know, how I highly always appreciated and I appreciate (yes what there — liked and I like!) you not only for appearance, but also for character, for soul, for mind … Whole (in a cheek) — three times! Alexey. P. S. Alina, druzhochek mine! Just very figurative comparison which I should share with you, native mine was born in my head. Here it: to exchange me, the 50-year-old muzhik, ALEXEY DOMASHNEVA, on the 17-year-old boy, it all the same that — the jeep on is great, and is even more exact: Dostoevsky's 15-languid collected works on a book any Kuelo. Romanticism! Cool? Alyoshe, on August, 5th, 23-46 I (Appreciate) Thanks for long made out thought (for a long time I from you did not receive such long mails!). I will note about THURSDAYS and SUNDAYS! Good night, Lyosha! See you tomorrow. Smoke. To Alina, on August, 7th, 22-15 (When there has passed euphoria …) Alinka, native mine! Now, when you are walked-have a good time on Quay (if not somewhere more secluded) with a young albino, and I enjoy at home silence and loneliness (D. N has left a city with spending the night on a visit), I have suddenly felt, that euphoria, in which I bathed after today's our appointment (and it was perfect: affinity «under the full program», almost as before … By the way, and oral something was — I caressed you … Thanks!!!) — this sweet euphoria gradually leaves my interior and gives way to grief and again to insult, already on concrete, ordinary and even to a prozaichesko-household occasion. And I think-reflect here of what. Well the destiny so throws you, throws out with you such improbable kolentsa?! There was at you a dealer soap (it I about CHashkine) which on all parametres and concepts did not cost also a little finger on your left foot. Thanks God, you have found in yourself courage — have torn with it. And after a while has fallen in love to depth of soul (I believe!) in the professor-writer (I mean myself). Thanks heavens!!! It is fair! It is clear! It is logical! The Student-honours pupil, the talented poetess (and can, and ingenious!), I do not speak about your doubtless journalistic gift — and should make a similar choice. But here — new more than strange vital turn new more, and the professor-writer is changed for any messenger-waiter of coffee … Smoke, darling! I already was somehow apprehended-was understood-was realised-has reconciled by that, choosing between a 17-year-old gopher and a 50-year-old goat (it I about itself), the young girl can quite choose a young bright gopher, but here thought, that me, the professor and the writer enough known in native places, the person creative (it I all about myself), have exchanged for the market six — rather oppress. Alina, Alina, clever you washing, the kind and warm girl! And what for you so have lowered me??? It is necessary to me to adhere now a loop to a chandelier, to climb up an armchair and bystrenko to compose a naturalistic essay under the name «the life Ending» … Here to what hrustnyh razmyshleniev leads up unfortunate (a grief to me, a grief!) people loneliness and euphoria leak. Farewell, zhestokoserdaja! And. D, prafesar, prazaih, dramaturh, literaturoved etc. P. S. Be the friend: send-present to me the password from the majl.ru — prove the friendship and promised doveritelnost!!! In advance thanks! P. P. S. By the way, a surname of yours If, how you mentioned, — nesushkin? Then it is more logical to call him not a gopher, and — a chicken … Alyoshe, on August, 8th, 2-32 (Three feathers!!?) 1. It is more words to you I will not tell about it! After all knew, that you will not disregard it (an albino, the market six, a bright gopher, a chicken …) 2. From majl.ru the password I will not tell (has not deserved!), Alex you mine, a pancake razetaky! In feuilletonists, whether that, has moved? It is necessary to comment only on yours under … bki words of one immortal writer: «At whom laugh? At itself laugh!» 3. Tomorrow (is more correct — already today) I will come to you home in 10 or in the beginning 11‑го. Meet bread-salt! Alina. To Alina, on August, 8th, 20-06 (I Thank!) Alina, the Smoke, thanks for today's domashne-ritual sex at me on a visit — such unusual, touching, TRUSTFUL!!! Now about hrustnom. On a kitchen garden under the scorching sun and in melancholy loneliness any oppressing thoughts climb in a head. Today has crept here what. Apparently, you have a danger to degrade. Not without reason in the people speak: tell me whom you live with and I will tell you who you are. Well collect all objectivity and impartiality and agree: choosing between poetic evening (with me) and visiting slipshod circus-chapiteau (with it) — to choose circus … It is symptomatic!!! I am afraid, that of years through five, having met you, I will see instead of thin, romantic, poetical and talented Smokes — round Dynku (and even — Dunk'у) in which dim eyes there will be only discos, walks on quay, kinoshki-circuses, beer yes the rabbit sex … Then, excuse, I for certain about myself will exclaim: native washing, is better you would die!. Alina, darling, it not under … bki as you would like to think-consider, is fear, a pain, melancholy. I like you. Alexey. P. S. Please, NOT BE happy With ANOTHER!!!!! Alyoshe, on August, 8th, 23-03 (I before you in huge to a debt) Lyoshenka, as though I wished to live with you in your house!!! You — the best, remarkable, unusually thin and gentle!!! In my heart you such were, is and will be!!! Thanks that you worry about me! Thanks for the TODAY'S!!! Leave me a part of the life, I ask!!! Yours of the Smoke. To Alina, on August, 8th, 20-06 (As though to specify!) Alina, a strange fog of your syllable does not allow me to understand your words unequivocally. Namely: 1) why — as though I wished to live with you; instead of — I wish to live with you? 2) to leave a life part — in what sense: to leave and leave or not to forget? Would explain, native mine! AND. Alyoshe, on August, 8th, 23-29 (It is thought …) 1. Would like, but there was irreparable … I about it will dream too much. It is possible? 2. To leave a life part — not to forget me, not to hate, and to like AND THINK of me!!! Here such here explanations. How a summer residence and job? (Something at me sending of letters gljuchit.) Alinka. To Alina, on August, 8th, 23-40 (Reasonable words) 1) Alina, everything is reparable, except death! The main thing, having started to do nonsense — not to continue them to do and not to aggravate a situation. From any situation there is an exit. Especially, if people reasonable, conceiving and understanding, that a life at them one not to avoid errors, but any error always can be corrected. There would be a desire and brains. What for (lives) to dream of it, when it is possible to live simply??! 2) By itself. But it would be desirable (your syllable!) to embrace and kiss you live, CORPORAL, instead of in dreams. Same it is silly. In dreams if I HAVE lost you IRREPARABLY (zri the beginning of point of 1st). 3) On a kitchen garden I was till 18-00, have started clouds to be condensed — have left. D. N has appeared in 21‑00 (and I about SOMETHING have vaguely regretted!). You speak about what job — have not understood. Read all the evening long Haruki Murakami (for a long time so slowly and long did not read the book!) Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 8th, 23-43 (Two feathers) 1. Job is and there is a kitchen garden. So you have answered this question. 2. Yes, I too have regretted about one. It was necessary to us to test your bath together! I. To Alina, on August, 8th, 23-51 (It is not over yet …) Alinka, about a bath — it is not over yet: what our years! All — ahead! Only here confuses in this plan, that all my REASONABLE WORDS have whistled by your attention and soul … Hrustno, druh mine, hrustno! AND. Alyoshe, on August, 9th, 0-13 (Important issue) Lyosha! Give we will be talked-will communicate tomorrow. Mother waits for a call (from gone on a spree my brother), therefore phone to occupy it is undesirable. Besides I read our mails, which already 252 (to be stunned!) pages (and I while on 20th, as well as it am necessary to my early age). Frets? Do not take offence for dryness — simply I am broken off on a part: and with you to correspond, and us to read. Good night. I Dive into our histories. As it is remarkable, that you have built them and unpacked! Smoke. Alyoshe, on August, 9th, 23-52 (Chaotic) Lyosha! We had time to live a life in our mails for one hundred enamoured people on this planet!!! At us with you UNIQUE, UNIVERSAL and ALL-CONSUMING love! (If you wish to strangle me — make it tomorrow!) Good night! (I do not refuse one word from my mails!) Alinka. Alyoshe, on August, 10th, 20-04 (Question) Lyosha! That you do, you think? In general, how are you doing? Alina. To Alina, on August, 10th, 23-07 I (Regret) I am engaged onanizmom. Certainly, figuratively speaking. Namely: I sit, I think and terribly I regret, that so quickly and resolutely in due time has chosen between Olej (from which was quite happy) and you. Probably, there was I terrible and not absolutely cynical fool! Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 10th, 23-50 (Answer) Between lake and the sky choosing — Better depth or height — At desires find borders-sides: To float you you wish or — to fly? To Alina, on August, 10th, 23-57 (Successful flight) Fly! Alyoshe, on August, 11th, 0-06 (Different interpretations) Alexey, be not foolish! The question vashche intended to you, as well as a choice: Olja or I — the lake or the sky to float or fly … Alina. To Alina, on August, 11th, 0-17 (??????) Alina, you already something absolutely to behave in a queer way begin. What questions to me can be????? In January I HAVE chosen YOU, ruthlessly and severely having humiliated, having offended and having offended by behaviour Olju. I do not know, depth or height has chosen, but I have made the CHOICE. About what, I repeat, possibly, it is necessary to regret … Cease to poeticize, please, awful and in something, excuse, bljadskoe behaviour! Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 16th, 16-00 (Flag of truce) Lyosha, Lyoshka! Allow to be reconciled! I choke without your air. I (as it was always) go to you from the guilty. Why you do not greet me? With everything, except me. People between whom was and are so much, unless so they pay each other for happiness? So they thank? Lyoshenka, you do not leave at me a head and heart. I do not ask to remain friends (though very much-very I want!), I know, that I can not demand, but give — at least friends. I ask, I beg … Allow me, allow to be though on millimetre more close! Really I for you an empty place? I think of you more often, than you can present to yourself … I stretch you a hand, take it, PLEASE … Alinka. To Alina, on August, 17th, 17-00 (Without a theme) Alina, most of all amazes me, why you do not understand, that to me is sick what you HAVE thrown me, what you With ANOTHER what you with IT are happy? It does not keep within in my head. Egoism any in the concentrated kind. Alexey. To Alina, on August, 18th, 0-17 (very important message!) Alina, Alinka, the Smoke mine! Perhaps this last my message to you — concern it more than seriously. I have got tired. Yesterday after our foolish conversation-conflict on Quay heart at me has again taken, the whole hour otlyozhivalsja with validol under language has hardly reached the house. Also thought: well here, the old fool, and you will be died-skopytish of love! More shortly as Govorukhin spoke: so to live it is impossible! Thanks God, fine helps me now Murakami: I read greedily its novel «Chronicle of the Clockwork Bird» — this piece will be more feasible than "Magician", and very much-many that efficient I scoop from this immense book for myself, for our situation, in general for a life … Alina, I will speak directly. I terribly DO NOT WANT, that you have left-has disappeared from wash lives! I terribly DO NOT WANT, that also I have left your life-destiny. In day of our MEETING (on 29th of December) I was immensely (as it seemed to me) am happy, quiet, self-assured also world around … For SOMETHING you have appeared, for SOMETHING you were entered-has rushed into my life, absolutely it have changed, have turned concepts about happiness, about sense of existence … Really it is all were casual?! Really it only all — a ridiculous case, unmotivated circumstances, a silly joke of Destiny??!! Now I know only one, that I still and even more strongly, than before, like you, that you are necessary to me, that without you the world at all that and sense in a life is not enough. I wish to hope (and I hope!), as you to me still had any original love, that I «do not leave at you a head and heart», that you «think of me more often, than I can present to myself» … Alina, lovely my and native girl! I long thought, I painfully reflected and I wish to offer you the following. At us with you is, possibly, only three variants of the further relations. It is necessary to make a choice. 1) HUMAN, NORMAL. You come back to me, we forget this our ridiculous crisis as a dreadful hungover dream and we will try to be anew together and happy (ONLY we!), having forgotten about other world. 2) the COMPROMISE. One day (evening) in a week will be ours and ONLY ours. Other six days of week of your life me will not concern and even I (will try) to interest. One day (evening) we will be lovers, is more correct — enamoured each other, other six — kind friends-friends (it is natural if you with another is not pardoned on my eyes). 3) COMPELLED, FOOLISH. Total boycott (at least for my part), hatred (mutual or unilateral), rage, conflicts, heart attacks, in a word — dur, dur and dur, as last days. I simply beg you, Alina, clever my girl, we will not do each other painfully. Give we will make the CORRECT choice. That's it, people, «between which was and is so much», should not leave, tear with blood an umbilical cord which very firmly connects them. I do not speak about wings! Alina, I LIKE YOU! Do not rush it!!! Alexey D. Alyoshe, on August, 18th, 18-35 (I do not know …) I do not know what to do!. To Alina, on August, 19th, 16-32 (About friendship and love) Alina, always (and especially recently) I more your body appreciated in you mind. To it now also I address. 1) About poetic evening. The literature, poetry is only ours: your and my. It is a part of ours with you (only ours with you!) lives. Therefore it will be more logical, if on your poetic evening there will be I, instead of it. Do not indulge nesushkina! Do not accustom to thought-comprehension, that it it is undivided, it is uncontested and absolutely owns you, your time, your life. Day — no trouble let will have a rest: at you with it all life ahead. To a word thereupon — for you dolzhok. In my birthday if you have not forgotten, we agreed: THAT HAPPENS — we mark your birthday only together … And you have noted it with it. Eh, Alina, Alina! 2) Variants of ours with you of relations. I — not the fool (with it you will not argue?). I quite understand-realise, that 1st variant is unreal, impassable, impossible, fantastic. Reluctantly, I agree the second. Do not deceive itself: you too would like, that I touched you, kissed, caressed, ENTERED-GOT into you … Start up it does it daily and, maybe, repeatedly. But — you never will be it I do IT in another way, at me OTHER smell enough while you completely and up to the end will not erase me from the heart, the soul, the memory … I, I IN ANOTHER WAY caress, I speak OTHER words … And all IT is expensive you till now. It (I, my smell, my touches, my caresses, my words) excites you till now. Alina, lovely, it is not necessary to resist! It — is silly. It — childly. It is violence over self, over me, over our feelings, over our memory. These ours with you half a year — the most perfect, that was in my life. And, I hope, in yours. Give not we will all it sharply and at all to cross out, become enemies, to push each other to nonsenses (alas, I have already made one!). Alina, Alinka, the darling you washing, never a bicycle will replace a jeep, will not replace it FOR HUNDRED PERCENT. Give sometimes itself to me and calm itself thought, that you do it ONLY FOR THE SAKE OF me, for the sake of there is no time (and till now!) the liked person — that I was not lost definitively … As I wish to reach your heart, to your reason! Well not absolutely you have bewitched??!! Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 19th, 20-04 (Questions and the tiny request) Lyosha! You where? Why SO has left? And about what EXIT (which you will undertake) today spoke? When you will return, necessarily call. Yours D. N me, probably, damns as can (I time 5-6 called). I bespokojus-worry. You again drink! Alinka. To Alina, on August, 19th, 22-28 (Request) Latunkina, I very much ask you: from … bis from me — NOT-ON-VI-ZHU!!! To Alina, on August, 20th, 21-52 (my Soul!) Alinka, well where you???? You have already swallowed some its sperm. About already navhodilsja in all your holes. Leave itself and me at least a slice. I too want you. Especially (agree!), its sperm same smelly, as well as at CHashkina. Only my caresses and my sperm to you are delightful. Accept it as a reality. Only present: all sperm, that you from it zaglotila — costs today at you in a throat, you toshnit, to you it is bad … I wish you to hate, but — I like. Recollect me. Alexey. P. S. You do not represent, as it is a pity to me you always (to tears!) during time mineta: your head so is touchingly wound … Alyoshe, on August, 20th, 22-10 (Horror!) Lyosh! How it is not a shame to you to me to write such MUCKS?! Count up, how much time you have used a word "sperm"! Most not toshnit? Lyosha! I ask you — do not do NONSENSES!!! Cease to drink! For the sake of me! Alina. To Alina, on August, 22nd, 04-00 (Declaration of love) Alinka, I am more and more convinced, that I like you, both very much and very much it would be desirable to believe, that you too understand all more clearly and more clearly, that you like me And ONLY me. Give on it we will go in cycles. We are created for each other. It is destiny. Alinka, the strange dream today has dreamt me. As if you were at me on a visit (really you, indeed, were?!), but we with you even plainly have not kissed, any more not speaking about all other. And as if I have fallen asleep, and you from me have gone to the albino to a gopher, you there have started obnimatsja-kiss it (it, I remind, — the dream) to fuck. It — sweaty, smelly, you lay under it and with melancholy think: My God, well why I not with Lyoshej now … I kiss on the mouth, in left sosochek, in Manechku. Again I wait on a visit! Lyosha Alyoshe, on August, 22nd, 9-48 (About a miscellaneous!) Lyosh! My mother all on tears: stop to call infinitely and to be silent! Today I till 7-8 evenings at Lenki. From it to you I will call. Yesterday you were simply awful: me offended, to Masha deep love admitted, then again to me in marriage suggested to leave and (a wreath to all!) — zadryh on a sofa. I will not come any more to you home, all has bothered me. Hate me is better, at you it turns out is better. Itself and D. N regret, be the clear head, you do not wish to drink (itself spoke-assured!). On you Bozhenka in temechko has rained kisses, you — talented: work, write, create! Also like Maria: it very beautiful, clever, gentle, liking, and feet, podi, at it not sinewy, not horse, as at Alina Latunkinoj (you to me yesterday such compliment has cooked up — thanks!) . She too likes you, live for the sake of this love, enjoy it, bathe in it! You are created for each other. The destiny has given you the most difficult test: time and in distance! If you sustain it are will be perfect! Embraces become even more sweet, and kisses are even hot … Wait it, she very much waits for you!!! Alina. To Alina, on August, 25th, 4-05 (very important) Alinka, Alinka! Alinushka! I Here sit now in the middle of night and the world (on hours — 4.03) and I think: My God, than anybody is closer and rodnee you at me are not present. Everything, more I will smear-rassusolivat nothing. I like you. Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 25th, 9-16 (With utretsa) Good morning, Lyosha! Thanks, that you are! Rain, pancake, and mood filosofichnoe (such weather to me to liking!). The summer very much is puffed up — does not start up on a threshold autumn. Though (whether to me to complain!) — I like similar weather stress. See you! Alinka. To Alina, on August, 26th, 4-46 (Night) Alina, I sit here now in full silence, in full loneliness, I reflect-think and — a horse-radish I do not understand. WHO you? WHAT FOR you? WHY you SUCH? Whether you one such, whether all your generation … At you some qualities of the soul, some concepts that such is good and that such is bad are washed away-atrofirovany. And the more so it is strange, that you read quite good books and like would understand their essence … Probably, at you the theory (the literature, cinema, moral principles) and a real life — on different poles, are incompatible. Alina, lovely, try to understand me, the person of other generation which possibly, already terribly has become outdated with the concepts that is possible also that cannot be done in this life to live with quiet conscience. 1) It is impossible (here I repeat) was to get acquainted and spend time on 13th of June (91/2 hours) with the boy to allow it to hold the hand with a wedding ring to touch a breast, it is terrible to wish to like it and most of it to grow fond and thus to feel-feel, how in you still there is my sperm, our potential child. 2) It is impossible (too I repeat) to arrange meetings-appointments with it in ours with you university. 3) It is impossible to happen to it on LITERARY evenings because I because of it cannot be on them, and for me it is a life, job, destiny. 4) And, of course, a trip to holiday on the south with it (and in Gelendzhik!) which you have planned are such TREACHERY of everything that was at us with you, that words at me simply are not present. You excuse, but only last prostitute, the woman without any morals can admit, that dreams with one muzhik can be carried out with another — what supposedly a difference … I understand, that my words on you will not work. I have already understood-has realised, that in this plan you really thick-skinned, you the egoist, you business and pragmatic not on age. You in this plan not girl Alina Latunkina, and simply — bljadyoshka Latunkina. But I nevertheless want, that there, in the South, you recollected and understood minutes of the high (after bathing, beer and when with it in bed), that you the TRAITRESS, that you have a rest ILLEGALLY, INADMISSIBLY and that all it from your party — NASTY THING … Live, have a rest, enjoy — time at you such strong nerves. Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 26th, 23-27 (Hrenovo) Lyosh! Excuse, that today could not contact you. In seven evenings only has come home. And here the SUCH has begun!!! Before we with Lenkoj walked on Quay, and then sat in ours with you "Slavjanke". I otkushala your liked "pot". But, unfortunately, it in my stomach has not got accustomed — yesterday's, whether that. Has pulled out (sorry) directly there and then, on a cafe porch. And houses (sorry) blevala without a stop. I so have understood, that you called. The grandfather has told: it was any man. But I could not call you (sorry!!!) — the mouth has been occupied (for your suspiciousness I specify — BLEVALA), and then — did not know, from what you apartments called. Now again potashnivaet, but like a stomach it was cleaned. In general, day atasnyj! I hope, at you not all so is bad also your place most visited today — not a toilet (as at me). And me to see, the God punishes … Alinka-wrong side. P. S. A-a-a-a!. I can not wait-walk more in the Internet. Something again me stirs up. I will go I will sit in «a philosophical room» (its mother!). Good night! To Alina, on August, 28th, 21-34 (Melancholy!) Alina, I do not understand, how I live without you these days and more any more I do not understand, how you live them without me. I like! I like!! I like!!! Came to you on Stihi.ru, I have looked your correspondence with any ohlamonami-poets … All the same hoped, that the Smoke you only for me. Naive I nevertheless the person. Alexey. Alyoshe, on August, 28th, 23-47 (Voprosiki) Lyoshka! 1. And where all of us this time were? 2. HOW you in general live and WHERE??? 3. That occurs? 4. How at you with health? Lyosha, protect it, take care! P. S. A smoke — my pseudonym on Stihire. Smoke Domashneva. |
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© Rosedkin Sergey Nikolaevich, 2001 |
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E-mail: emp-reports@fustercluck.com |
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