- Sergey Rosedkin -
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ME LIKES DZHULIJA ROBERTS Glik 17	Glik the seventeenth And — besides, because of damned money — so it is difficult!. Shop "Intim" has appeared in our sleepy small town as a bright sign of foolish seething reorganisation of years from tens back. It has settled down in a prestigious place — on the May Day area, in the neighbourhood with the regional Department of Internal Affairs, a law and order stronghold, and akkurat near to shop "Schoolboy" where the former pioneers-members of the Komsomol got textbooks on Russian yes to botany and stiratelnye elastic bands-lastiki, and present boy scouts, besides it, had an opportunity there and then, in the next bench, to buy the textbook on "Kama Sutra" and safety elastic bands … However, I did not dare to glance all in any way in this "Intim" — obscenely somehow. Once, the truth, having inflated with beer and having grown bolder, it was put was there, but on a threshold has been stopped by the moronic announcement: « For an input — 5 roubles ». Anything to itself, a museum have found! And this time, as who, besides, has pushed, I a next is loose-beer minute of the five have not regretted, as earlier on it it was possible to take a bottle of local beer, and now — and on half-bottles will not suffice. Still it also has urged on me: in"Intim"the price for an input have not lifted, means, like as though almost and the freebie turns out. I have entered, have put to the mistress, the aunt of years of forty with a strict face uchitelki-klassuhi* or, at least, saleswomen of"Schoolboy"and is perfect bljadskim prikidom Vivien from the first shots of"Beauty", a five-rouble coin and — felt the full idiot. Well, only to imagine: The intimate twilight, exciting silent music (which it was began to sound-zastruila as soon as I have given pjaterik), in a premise uniform live soul except me and this sexy tyolki with naked thighs and darkening under a vest-topikom sostsami which, having crossed under a sticking out breast of a hand, in an emphasis watches me, and around on walls — calendars with naked beauties in the bent poses, from under glasses of show-windows stick out yellow falloimitatory and pink vaginas of all sizes, colours and configurations … I do not know, how I have noticed among it snoshatelnogo good a precious thing for me — a cardboard box in size with the thick book: through a transparent window in a cover Sindi Crawford on a bright envelope and motochki multi-coloured wires was seen sidishnik with bared. I have disassembled the name on packing and have not sighed nearly — «TACTIL 2000». I all belly have scented is that I so long and unsuccessfully I search. And how I earlier, oligofren, have not guessed, that the name and should be such — "TAKTIL" and what to be on sale this thingummy should in such obscene place? I have looked at the price list, and my tone has fallen — 22 c.u.! — The girl, — I have asked with any masochistic hope, — tell, what is it? Really, if I was mistaken — to me it would become easier. — The complete set for virtual sex, — has stretched babets through a lip, has once again measured me with a lazy sight from ochochkov to Chinese krossovok, — For it the computer is necessary … — Tell, please, and how much it costs on ours? — I have even more politely enquired and what for have added: — I the house calculator has forgotten … — Well so at the rate, — has even more pejoratively filtered putanistaja klassuha, — in the same place it is clearly specified, in Russian. It is necessary to look is better, and that — the calculator any!. I have peered through the raised points — and is exact: near to standard units by which were ciphered shtatovskie smelly dollars, in round skobochkah appeared and "in Russian" — 616 re. — If to be exact, the madam, — I have told, being straightened and is strict on it looking, — all prices at you are specified on the cleanest Arabian. Also it is the fact as one abrupt companion-men in the novel "Newly ploughed virgin soil" of Nobel winner Michael Aleksandrovicha Sholokhov used to say. It — first. And secondly, with a computerisation at us problems just are not present, but there are time difficulties with a financial cash, therefore we should provide with you kastomizatsiju in the manner of the Schengen agreement for the purpose of productive dialogue-marketing. I hope, it not last copy "Taktilja"? Last? Then especially! On Wednesday I will approach in same about time with money, and, I hope, you for me adhere-postpone this thing. Here, just in case, my card … I have stretched opupevshej to the woman who almost on a rack "quietly" already stood, cut-away on which that has read: The Department of Internal Affairs of Baranovsky area Special policy group (OMON) The assistant to the commander THE BOLUCHEVSKY Vladimir Gerasimovich Ph. sluzh. 53-30-60 All honour on honour, cut-away was not false — me her Boluchevsky Century G, the competitor of faculty of law of our University, has handed over-has presented not so long ago, when I edited its lethal dissertation. But I was disturbed by another: and suddenly the madam from "Intim" knows omonovskogo the chief in the person? And suddenly her will guard — why it I "will approach", when to a building of regional militia from here only half-hundred metres? Outwardly I too am hardly similar on mentovskogo the chief. And more me slightly oppressed, that I plainly did not remember a word meaning "kastomizatsija", and with «the Schengen agreement» and "dialogue-marketing" there were ambiguities … ** However, I here and have straightened out myself: mentovskie bosses on foot do not go at all, and shabby jeans and krossovki now — a daily uniform of all and everyone to Russia … I should think of other: I did the order, a thing postponed, and — with what shishami I will pay off? But, certainly, the word-concept "environment" has jumped out not without reason — subconsciousness stuck. There was a midday of Sunday, on 30th of July, on Wednesday should give out at job of the grandma (to it I and shikoval on beer — raspotroshil ostatnjuju a grist), and I already expected-foresaw in advance, that again I will make large antifamily kunshtjuk, both Dostoevsky was expressed. And happens. However, the salary was given out per day earlier, by 1st, but I to fuss did not become. Having received the unfortunate 730 one rubles, I have hidden them in a crack under the bottom box of the editorial table, and houses were played by performance in style of an ancient theatre of tragedy: having declared slightly under a high (a glass for spirit!) I have taken seat in a hall on a padded stool, have buried the person in a palm and have begun to cry — literally, almost navzryd have begun to cry. I teeth creaked and beat myself a fist on a knee to a bruise — here what have reached! And against these serious sufferings I have told to the disturbed Anna as has squeezed today — the fool! The cretin!! debiloman!!! — to the overflowed trolley bus though always preferred from job home on foot to go, and, please, umyknuli-have filched all salary from a back pocket of jeans!. I, certainly, not Dzhulija Roberts, not Richard Gere and at all Bodrov-junior — played I badly, false, uselessly. Anna Ioannovna has not believed. She has decided, that I have distributed at once all debts or for something zanachil money (here babskoe a scent!). It shouted so, that Baksik has not turned grey nearly, it has sprinkled me a malicious saliva from a head to feet and even has tried naveshat slaps in the face, but here it I — as was guilty and mean — any more have not allowed. Then Anna from powerlessness and bitterness has burst into tears, has cried at ease, otplakalas, has collected a bag and early in the morning has left in the Arable Corner — the blessing, at it holiday has begun. And at last she has wished me: — That you here with hunger have died! But with goloduhi I while did not think of death, and with quiet conscience (money is as though written already-off!) has rushed off on Wednesday directly since the morning in dissolute shop. And there, in "Intim", me have unexpectedly surprised-have pleased: it was suddenly found out, that my desired «TACTIL» costs any more 616, and only 480 rublikov — at once it became clear, that OMON at us respect and the guess has proved to be true, that this toy is sexual-virtual, certainly, from piracy stocks, otherwise, for sure, would cost in general time in ten more expensively. Vivat modern flibusteram! Without them we, Russian-computer poverty, till now, at the best, doiskopaemo DOC’или, dolbaja on klave without interruption and trying to disassemble a moronic white font on a nasty dark blue background … *** So, at me money on the August Internet (though it and has risen in price, but has decreased the access limit so for 20 hours it was required now 140 re), as a result, were found, and more one hundred with superfluous remained on livelihood., Certainly, I to pay for apartment and phone was not going to, and would not suffice. However, yes well them, to r-r-rastakoj mothers, these pennies-copecks — me not to them while was. I, having pulled out in the evening from job, have hastily intercepted pelmeni which, fortunately, almost still the full pack was frozen in "Pole", have saturated with a boiled sprat kotjaru and — have started … I have carefully washed up hands, have taken seat in the camera armchair-revolving object, have approached closely on a table, have reached the left hand a portrait from «Marie Claire» and it is tender, quivering, zapredelno have gently spent a small pillow of the big finger on smiling warm lips: — Hi, Dzhulija! Hi! It is ritual. And Dzhulija as usually, for an instant hardly has blinked as a sign of a greeting of an eye and hardly has more widely moved apart lips in a tender smile. — Okay! — I have summed up udovletvoryonno, and on it almost all my knowledge shtatovskogo an English ischerpalis-have come to an end. First of all I have dragged the system block on a table, have opened and have inserted small to a kerchief into socket Graphic Port’a. Then has connected the scanner and has given a food and while my lout was warmed up, checking as it is necessary, anti-virus inspector Kaspersky on presence unnecessary us virtual pedikulyoza or a syphilis, I have attentively seen a book-instruction to "Taktilju" — usual gadstvo: « Made in China », and explanatories are not present not only in Russian, but even on the most Chinese. Only for white — English, Français, Niderlands, Espaňol, Italiano, Deutsch … I have scanned an English variant, have started PROMT 98 and have politely asked to translate. In spite of the fact that giant Promtushka occupies in my computer world almost hundred mbyte of a living space, rabotnichek it so-so, hrenovenky. But at the very least I in its clumsy transfer where have understood, where have guessed. The following turned out: 1) to play this toy children to 18 was not recommended; 2) program TACTIL 2000 is created on 3D-technologies on the basis of programs of type CONAN and Xing MPEG Player, combining« in one bottle »entsefalograf, the cardiograph, reograf, a polygraph, miograf, everyones other ografy, plus of achievement of virtual volume video and computer igralok-simulators; And 3) a hat-grid from provodkov followed attach on a head, and pink contacts-suckers which five pairs, to distribute as follows: two on a palm, two on the ankles, two on the dummies, two on the kidneys, one in groin area, under most «a life root», and last — in area promezhnosti. Before it, clearly, it is necessary to strip to the skin. Ridiculously, of course, but to recede I was not going to. Me only has confused still, that as objects for taktilno-sexual entertainments in this virtual public house have been prepared, except Sindi Crawford, still Pamela the Anderson with ridiculous silikonovym an udder and any latinos Natalia Orejro — I soap serials do not look, I do not know. But — it was necessary to test «the love unit». Certainly, I have chosen Sindi. First, the beauty, of course, and from those fatal pobeditelnyh beauties-vamp on which I and to look in full eyes I do not dare, when I meet in a real life. And secondly, not only that sweet of an inaccessible fruit dropped out possibility to taste-try so still a piquancy to a sex dish was added by feeling as though a certain vengeance: after all the husband of Sydney Crawford was yet so a long time Richard Gere … I have merged the program from a pancake in a computer, have wandered still on Help’у, have looked at drawings-schemes, something peretolmachil by means of promta. In section parametres especially in a high has gone, that it was possible to establish three, so to say, speeds sexual igrishch: slow — slowly; middle — it is normal; furious — without restraint. To risk for first time I did not become — has established «slow». As it was recommended, the intimate twilight — the pink-checked evening dawn immodestly looking in a window has been created, I have fenced off a curtain, then have exposed-has chucked out from a room of a cat-podgljadyvatelja, have undressed, have covered an armchair wide bannym with a towel that not kontachit a sweaty back and a bum with a sticky leather substitute, has fitted all contacts and have cluck (gliknul!) On an icon-starter — polilas-zastruilas already familiar melody (in "Intim" to see, have borrowed it from this disk), I as it was recommended by game rules, have leant back rasslablenno on an armchair back, not tearing off a sight from the screen. On him it pojavilas-was weaved from air, from mysterious depth of flickering background Sindi, in the bottom lacy linen, as always — unsmiling … To admit, I have started business with a sceptical grin, assuming, that all will resemble on ordinary videopornushku, but, it is necessary to recognise, in something results have surpassed-have surpassed expectations: during any moment I have not noticed, how have closed eyes, but to see have not ceased and have as though come to be in action — I, and the truth, felt-felt under palms elasticity of a female body, humidity and tenderness of a skin, heard knock of another's heart! Only there was this flesh any not dense, too pliable as if I rumpled an inflatable rubber doll. And more terribly there was no smell of the woman and its voice: computer Sindi only pristanyvala, basovito ohala also sobbed during the most peak moments … After the first session I have given myself respite half an hour, have taken a sip for lifting of forces of coffee and have started program test in a mode «furious». Again outwardly and, so to say, internally all was o'kej, the virtual partner moved intelligently, breathed roughly, kissed vzasos, almost to a pain scratched to me a back in ecstasy impulses, but subconscious sensation-knowledge of that I, sidjuchi stark naked in front of the computer, simply am engaged onanizmom — did not disappear. In one of the hot moments I, absolutely going mad, even have tried to fasten dialogue: — Sindi — I have murmured, — Sindi, to you it is good with me? Crawford at all has not lifted eyes, continuing the inconceivable oral caresses in a mad rhythm, it already at all ohala, did not groan, and somehow absolutely in an owl's way crashed and is furious, as a panther, growled … For these two sessions I have been squeezed out-is milked dry, as if a trustful collective-farm cow by a milking machine, to a droplet but to tell, that I have received satisfaction is would be strong exaggeration. Here gadstvo! If all will occur in the same way and with Dzhuliej when it will occupy a place to another's me Sindi Crawford — well it to hell, this TACTIL  2000! Well it to devils dog this computer spermodoilku! Yes to me on a fig such naked prostitutsky sex!. I wished to like Dzhuliju! ______________________________ * I even have not understood at once, that for "klassuha" such, but, it appears (the niece have prompted), present teenagers so tenderly call class rukovoditelnits. ** Well still! And I if about the Schengen agreement heard (a mode of open borders between some European countries) for "kastomizatsiej" and "dialogue-marketing" it was necessary to climb on site Gramota.ru (Teen party). It has appeared: the first is the American term designating the tendency of rapprochement of subjects of the market; the second — information-computer techniques of definition of consumer demand. *** Apparently, Sergey fondly thinks-is assured, that Windows — the top, ceiling Software and is better than anything will not be already thought up. <<<Glik the sixteenth Glik the eighteenth>>>
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© Rosedkin Sergey Nikolaevich, 2001
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